Tag Archives: reality testing

Reality Testing Your Business

23 Sep

Have you ever heard of reality testing? It’s the ability to keep your emotions from excessively influencing how you interpret events (i.e. to be objective). Reality testing can be a great tool when working in a team, assessing a problem or . . . when launching your own business. Ottawa entrepreneur, Ashley Grandy has been kind enough to answer some questions this week around the theme of reality testing.

Along with her business partner, Ashley has launched an interested concept for the city of Ottawa with her business, Safe Way Home. This driving service drives home clients when they are no longer within legal limits of alcohol consumption.  But not only that – they drive your car home too. So the next morning. Ashley’s company is now in talks with some very big clients (as you’ll see. Think “Hockey”), but it’s taken some serious objective thinking to get this far in her company’s success.

Ashley, would you describe yourself as a realist or an idealist? How does this description manifest itself in your job?

“Realist. I have realistic expectations when it comes to clients and have pragmatic expectations for the pace of my business’ growth; putting time, energy, money, planning and personal investment into this business long before receiving financial reward.”

Can you describe a time when you should have listened to your instincts rather than being so objective. How do you confirm that your instincts are reliable?

My business partner at the growth stages felt that we wouldn’t be successful and wanted to cut our losses and give up.  I felt that it was premature and truly believed we had the foundation of a successful business if we could just get through the difficult beginning stages.  Now that we are in talks with the Senators and the calls are coming steadily, I’m happy I held my ground.

That’s why this business has been rewarding on both a professional and personal level; I’m learning to trust my instincts because I was fully prepared to learn a lot about business and had been researching, working hard and studying consequently but was unaware of the personal growth that would parallel this learning curve.

How would others describe the goals you set (Big hairy Goals or more attainable goals in small steps)? What information do you take into account when you set these goals?

Others would describe the goals I set as small, stable, safe, attainable goals.  What they don’t see is the large goals I am pursuing.  I have many visions but use them solely as a guide to setting the smaller, more attainable goals. It is these goals that other people are following that, in my mind, are just the steps necessary to attain the final objective.

When setting these smaller, more realistic goals, I consider my staff, co-workers and the tools they have to succeed in executing these goals and attaining this sense of achievement.  For the larger vision I have I consider the direction I want the business to go and how I want my business to appear; the personality I want my ‘Safe Way Home’ to exude to the public and the details necessary for achieving this goal.


Sister Leadership would like to issue a huge thanks to Ashley for sharing so openly about her experience with reality testing. Safe Way Home caters to individuals, corporations and events, and we with Ashley and her team the best of successes as they continue to grow.

cararesourcesSo why is reality testing important for your emotional intelligence? That’s what we’re asking and answering in this week’s Sister Leadership resource from the tool box. This week we are giving you eleven key take-aways of assumption to help you stay objective. First on the list, “You cannot not communicate.” Click her to read the rest of the snippets, and learn their meanings.

Till next week!


Camille Boivin is founder of Sister Leadership, certified in EQi 2.0 and EQ360, a master practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), has been coaching high-level women and men for over six years, and is now opening her expertise to those emerging in business. Camille pulls her blog topics from her unique coaching approach that combines her training as a EQi 2.0 and EQ360 certified facilitator with the dig-deeper tools of NLP.

Get in touch here if you’d like to talk with Cam about group or one-on-one coaching, and EQ assessments. With the miracle of Skype and telephones – distance is no issue!


How to Beat Your Imposture Syndrome

25 Feb

You’d be amazed at the number of people who feel as though they’re imposters. And being a coach of some high-level leaders, I can tell you that this experience is normal across the board. So many of us (at least in our own minds) are faking it. BUT the truth is, your confidence is all about your thinking patterns. So in today’s post we’ll be looking at why and how you can move away from your insecurities into anchor into your success. Plus, for your entertainment, I’ll share a ridiculous story about when I first started in sales – talk about faking it!

The great thing about challenges (Even if we fail. Even if we’re terrible!!) is that they are preparing us for what’s next – they are aligning us somehow with our greater goals in life. Michael Gelb’s Framework for Genius captures this with his concept of Dimostrazione: “A commitment to test knowledge through experience, persistence and a willingness to learn from mistakes.”

So here’s a little Dimostrazione for you.

When I was a fresh-faced 20 years old, I transitioned at Le Droit into the position of sales. I was the first women salesperson (salesman back then), and had no clue what I was doing. Everyone had this faith in my sales abilities, and I thought they would discover any second that it was all a lie. For instance, guess to whom I was assigned to sell ad space? Car salesmen! And I say ‘men’ because they were all men.  Plus the job was in Ottawa, which was a new city for me.

So there I was in Ottawa, totally unaware of the roadways and new in the job. Thank goodness for GPS. . .

OH WAIT! GPS didn’t exist. Thank goodness for giant maps unfolded on the seat beside me that I had to pull over to double-check while getting on and off the highway and navigating one-way streets, country roads and suburban homes that all looked alike!

My knuckles turned white on the steering wheels back in those days as I drove between car lots.

People told me I was such a good sales person. But here’s the thing, I had nothing in common with the men to whom I sold ad space. These were car guys. I’m not a car lady. They had different values from me, different perceptions. As I drove toward the sale, I’d be fretting about how my ‘good numbers’ were masking my complete incompetency. But then, almost as if by miracle, as I finally found the car lots and arrived to make the pitch . . . a changed happened. I was faking it.  I faked my connection, faked my alignment, faked my understanding of their needs . . . and yet, I became aligned with the idea of helping these car salesmen become great in their marketing. It was like I slipped into the role simply by forcing myself to perform.

Little did I realize that I was really feeding into an ability to relate to different perspectives, and give guidance to those with different experiences (like a coach does). Back then I helped people create great marking for themselves, which helped prepare me for my coaching today, where I help people create amazing leadership.

A while back Sister Leadership interviewed Dr. Rukhsana Malik, who is an incredibly successful woman with so much life experience. She said something that truly applies – and blows away – the imposter syndrome: “I am calm because I can do a million things, and I’ve done a million things in my life.”

Wow. How can we be like that too? Here are some ideas to get you started.

  • Anchoring: A neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) tool for creating a new pattern of thought toward success. Wouldn’t it be incredible if we could acknowledge our success and anchor them into our bodies and thought patterns? For example, in my case: “I’ve made strong sales before and now I’m going to help this company get what their need to sell cars. “
  • Reality Testing: Comparing how you feel about a situation vs. what the reality of the situation. Chances are you’ve tackled your challenges before in a different variation, and you can do it again now. Reality testing helps grow your self-awareness, self-regard, and self-love.

Anchoring into your success and reality testing in the situation are fantastic tools of NLP and Emotional Intelligence (EQ) which I use all the time for my coaching clients. We’ll be talking more about them in the months to come on Sister Leadership.

So the next time you fake it as you make it – stop a moment and really look at the pattern that is being lived. Does it tie into your successes or your insecurities? Realign that thinking. Because Dimonstrazione is happening every day. Each step forward helps you learn, and makes you better. You are not  an imposter, you are simply constructing your own genius.

Till next time!

Camille Boivin is founder of Sister Leadership, bringing her knowledge of resilience, perseverance, and changing perception to others. Camille is currently accepting applications for the Women’s Executive Network  Senior Executives Wisdom Peer Mentoring program. Applications to this exciting and knowledge-sharing program are available here.

Read more from Camille as she aspires to  help women explode their success. For more posts and experiences, join Camille at her Sister Leadership page, connect on Twitter, and follow on Facebook.

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